Monday, January 23, 2012

Bind my Wandering Heart to Thee

     "My son, pay attention to what I say:  listen closely to my words.  Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body.  
     Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.  Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk from your lips.  Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you.  Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm.  Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil."  Proverbs 4:20-27


     Will and I have been trying to go through the Proverbs with Reagan.  Last week, we were reading this verse and, yet again, God began to speak to me through this passage.  The funny thing was, I wasn't quite sure (other than the obvious words on the pages) what He was saying to me.
      I haven't posted anything in three days.  I had mentioned earlier that my goal (with great intentions) was to post everyday.  However, God showed me quickly that this could easily become ritualistic and He preferred a flexible heart (a flexible heart leads to freedom...another gift).
     So, for three days I pondered.  One of my favorite verses in the Bible is in Luke 2:19, "...But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart."  So many good things to see and to hear over the weekend.  Rainy, lazy, restful days.  God did not lead me to document any of it.  He just allowed me to treasure it and ponder, to rest.  God allowed this verse in Proverbs to stand out, and I believe since then he has been weaving the following into my heart, opening my eyes and ears to what He is saying and only allowing its very simplified articulation until now.
     First, the obvious for me..."pay attention to what I say:  listen closely to my words.  Do not let them out of your sight..." More of God encouraging me to open up my eyes and see (sight), to pay attention, to stay awake, a reoccurring theme in His word.  Also, a reminder to stay in His word.  The daily discipline of reading the Bible.  His living story, sustained thousands of years...a miracle, a gift in and of itself.
     Second, "keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body."  Two posts ago, I wrote about becoming untangled.  This was a reminder of the interconnectedness of our spiritual and physical beings.  What is good for the heart is good for the body.
     Third,  "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.  Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk from your lips."  Guarding my heart has been a discipline I have only recently began consciously pursuing.  While in Virginia this past fall, we stayed with some friends who live very close to an Amish community.  We were talking about the no TV/no technology rules this community embraces.  He said when he asked one of them, they explained (and I am over-simplifying and condensing here) that one of the reasons they did not watch TV was the rapidity of which information came at you.  That your brain does not have time to process what it is seeing or hearing before it reaches your heart.  It reaches your mind so quickly, unfiltered and then spills into your heart (sometimes without us ever being aware).  I couldn't argue with that logic.  I got rid of the satellite.  My attempt to guarding my heart (we still watch movies so I am not exactly sure how that is different, but it saves money anyway ;).  Realizing the need to rely on God's help in guarding this treasure (before I bury myself in rules...so Type A of me).  I read His words.
       I love how this verse ties guarding our hearts directly to our words.  What spills forth from our mouths is a direct reflection of our hearts.  This, I needed to be reminded of!  Today, for me, guarding my heart means less talking, more hearing. It reminded me of a quote I once read,
"There was a wise, old owl who lived in an oak,
the more he saw, the less he spoke.
The less he spoke, the more he heard.
Why can't we all be like that bird?"
     Fourth,  "Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you."  Our pastor constantly reminds us that life is about simply taking and focusing on the next step (a discipline that I have grown to love).  Only living in today, right now, that is all I have...a gift.  Last night, Will and I were watching previews to a movie and the trailer for War Horse came on (a rainy, movie weekend...another gift).  I was only half paying attention until I heard this quote..."Can you imagine flying over a war and you know you can never look down?  You have to look forward, or you'll never get home.  I ask you, what could be braver than that?"  The Holy Spirit immediately wove that quote into my heart.  Hearing through ears that are striving to listen. I felt it was a message I was hearing directly from God.  The Grandfather who said this was explaining to his grandchildren how brave a soldier must be in battle to fulfill his sole goal, coming home.  This road may only be attained and conquered with eyes that look straight, a gaze that is direct.  God instantly reminded me of this verse, encouraged me to be brave, to look straight ahead, to fix my gaze on Him, and to someday reach home.
     Finally, "Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm.  Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil."  A gentle reminder.  By nature, I wander.  I have a very difficult time staying on any, one path.  This verse, I pray for Him to seal into my heart.  This verse brought me back to one of my favorite hymns.  One, I frequently play(Sufjan Stevens' version is my favorite) and frequently pray.  One that speaks to and about the heart.  All of this being connected, everything being connected to Him as He "binds my wandering heart to Thee."


"Come thou fount of every blessing, tune my heart to sing thy grace;
streams of mercy never ceasing, call for songs of loudest praise.
Teach me some melodious sonnet, sung by flaming tongues above. 
Praise the mount!  I'm fixed upon it, mount of thy redeeming love.
Here I raise my Ebeneezer, hither by thy help I'm come;
and I hope by thy good pleasure; safely to arrive at home.
Jesus sought me when a stranger, wandering from the fold of God;
He to rescue me from danger, interposed His precious blood.
O, to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!
Let thy goodness, like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee.
Prone to wander, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love;
here's my heart, o take and seal it; seal it for thy courts above."



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